Updated: Dec 6, 2018
Sometimes your greatest creations can stem for the most painful truths. And sometimes it takes hearing it from the right person for the dots to connect. For the message to come in clear. For the container to feel safe enough for you to expose what is really hiding underneath the surface.
Last night I called a friend that I now could call a sister. We met on a dance floor in Europe a few months ago. At the time I was deeply exploring my feminine energy, and naturally, I asked her what femininity meant to her. Within seconds she took my hands and started flowing and moving like a river to the music. In that moment, we didn’t need words. We just needed movement. It was the embodiment of the true feminine. It was so natural. That was my first introduction to ecstatic dancing. Dance has always been my creative outlet. But mixing dance with the intention of surrendering to the feminine energy was beautifully new for me. That night was the beginning of a beautiful friendship that has taken us to Estonia, San Francisco, Burning Man, and Barcelona. She is the girl I call when I need to open up and be heard. She is my safe haven. She is also the girl I call when I feel like celebrating. And last night, I called her with exciting news about a business expansion idea I had. I was expecting unfiltered encouragement to gush through my phone screen. Instead, she paused. Didn’t say anything. Took a breath. And finally said, it didn’t feel aligned. It didn’t resonate. It sounded more like I was creating a business plan to make money verses creating something pure from the heart. I was immediately hurt and discouraged. How could she not see the vision? Why did it not resonate? But as I sat with my emotion and contemplated her reasoning, I saw that she was right. I basically showed her a skeleton with no meat. I wasn’t showing any heart. I was creating from the masculine verses the feminine.
She questioned my intentions and my method. She called me out for not getting deep enough. I realized I was uncomfortable sharing my journey. I was scared to share the hardship. I feared sharing the emotion and the pain. And this was stopping me from being my most authentic self. After getting deep into why this is the case, I realized that the story I needed to share wasn't the end result after the struggling, it was the journey to get there. I need to share what I fear sharing. I no longer want to feel blocked. And to do that, I need to get vulnerable. We decided to start doing this together and recording it and I am committing to publishing my blog articles. What is your naked truth?